Stupid Sexy Priestface - Immaculate (2024)
What’s the best thing to do on Holy Thursday?
That’s right, get yourself completely and utterly piss-faced drunk, solely because the pubs are closed at midnight. And now that Ireland doesn’t do that shut-down thing any more, I guess we’re onto option number two: watch a horror film that is associated with the Catholic church.
Yayyyyyy!!!
Dreams Mean Nothing - The Sandman (2022)
I started to write this piece as a simple review of Neil Gaiman’s The Sandman, now streaming on Netflix; like the show itself, and the comic series at its origin, it turned into something far bigger, a historical narrative including random characters, with meanings and truths revealed as if from nowhere.
Like dreams, this review has become something more, an essay about writing itself, about narrative, about the consumption of art for both good and evil, and about its very effect on our lives.
Or maybe just mine.
A Hole Lot Of Glory - Glorious (2022)
We need more films about gloryholes; there, I said it.
Although, let’s be honest, said films already exist; they’re just shooting towards a slightly different viewer, a fact that is hard to swallow for some people.
Ravings - How My Brain (Sometimes) Works, The Star Trek Edition
Part Man, Part Spider, No Home - Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021)
Walking out of Spider-Man: No Way Home, I was struck by a lot of things.
With the film opening here in Ireland 15 December, I’m wholly aware that I’ll get to see it before a lot of people: there were signs up in the cinema’s bathroom asking visitors not to discuss the film because staff had not seen yet.
This…does not follow these rules. This is a blog post, from a writer and comic-book fan, talking about a film he’s just seen, dealing with emotion, with narrative, with story-telling…the things I write about.
Zombie Slots - Army Of The Dead (2021)
Heist movies. Yep, we’ve been there. Sure, they were and can be fun to watch, but rarely something that I adore and want to watch again - 2001’s Ocean’s 11, I’m looking right at you. And your totally unnecessary sequels.
Add other elements though, and you might actually get my interest. Give me a narrative in the hands of one of my favourite directors, Zach Snyder and I’m probably going to love.
Add elements like zombies and headshots, and you can have my money.
A Monster Mash - Godzilla Vs Kong (2021)
Like most of the other movies that are, were or have been due for release through 2020 and 2021, the release of Godzilla Vs Kong has turned into something of a mess. Originally due in cinemas November 2020 (cinemas? What are they?), rather than sitting on release for an indefinite period (cough, Disney, cough), the film’s release dates got moved around a bit and then got itself a home release.
That…is not necessarily a good thing, but it’s also not bad: home releasing at least means that your film gets out there, it gets seen and talked about. But it also means that you’re going to miss some of the cinematic experience itself, the grand breaths and comments from the rest of the audience that turn a film from more than just a movie into an experience.
I See What You Did There - WandaVision (2021)
I can accept change (if you know me at all, please stop laughing as you read this.) But when it comes to narrative, such changes have to be done in a fashion that they fit with the story you want to tell. Or perhaps with the story that wants to be told.
The story that wants to be told in WandaVision, Marvel’s newest comic-book adaptation, is a story of grief and mental health, and how they play in a world of super-heroics. WandaVision brings the world of the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) to an episodic TV format, one that will actually be acknowledged on other screens (unlike Agents Of Shield.)
As such, WandaVision is a story that works very well for what feels like seven of the show’s nine episodes, only to dramatically lose such appeal when coming to a close, forgetting any heart and focus it had, moving instead to solely show off its actions and powers.
Tis The Season To Be Happy - Happiest Season (2020)
I have to be honest: I made a face when I got to the end of Happiest Season thanks to some of the issues that I had with this film.
That’s right: it’s only some.
I sort of loved this queer, seasonal romantic comedy for exactly what it was, but I’m also a cynical cranky man who will look at things I didn’t like, wondering what would have made them better for me. With Happiest Season, a huge part of that was wanting an edit of the story, where someone could take the film and go “Yep, there are at least two very different narratives here, and to truly embrace a season that is so happy, you need to pick one. You don’t get to have it both ways.”
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